Shamlicht Kids Club Formed
By Adam Newton, Banana Dance Press Writer
October 3, 2007 CE / 57 Bureaucracy 3173 YOLD
Captain "Sesame Seed" Rogers and Sister Hooter announced that they've merged their Discordian youth groups Shamlicht Boys and Shamlicht Girls.
The new group, Shamlicht Kids Club*, promotes personal freedom, individualism, and the motto "Be Prepared for Anything." Both clubs' previous motto was "Be Protected from Everything." Spokesperson Pope Hilde said the new motto is much more useful, and "less subject to prosecution than keeping the kids locked in the closet all day had been."
Rogers founded Shamlicht Boys in August of 2005, while Hooter founded Shamlicht Girls in September of 2005. But Hooter claimed to have the idea first, a claim Rogers disputed. They finally agreed to disagree, and the new club was formed on October 3, 2007. (This is in honor of Luna Wilson, daughter of Robert Anton Wilson and Arlen Riley Wilson. The 15-year-old Luna's murdered body was discovered on Oct. 3, 1976).
Shamlicht Kids Club is for all sexes and all ages between X and Y. Members can choose their own uniform, and work for any of several merit badges, which include Community Service, First Aid, Brain Surgery, Writing, Poetry, Punning, Bicycling, Jockey, Jock Strap, Multiplication, Algebra, Training Bra, Estory, Gymnastics, Knot Tying, Sewing, Wedgies, Science, Fnord, Music, Discord, Dancing, Animal Husbandry, Animal Noises, Harbol Quest, Camping, Cooking, Chili Making, Tooting, Toilet Papering, Babysitting, Child Proofing, Child Photography, Puberty, Origami, Swimming, Diving, Sink, 1000 Blank White Cards, Painting, Artillery, Scuba, Fiber Arts, Underwater Basket Weaving, Jumping, Jakes, Calvin Ball, and Binky the WonderSkull Posers.
For more information, see Shamlicht Kids Club at http://discordia.loveshade.org/skc
*The group is sometimes called Smagmoid Kids Club
Comments
So it's finally a club? Congratulations I'm sure it will be a fine disorganization for kids of all ages.
Posted by: TawTew the Naturally Perfumed | October 5, 2007 06:28 AM
Any kid can join! And really it's totally not formal. Its for all Discordian kids. If you want to be a member you're a member!
Posted by: Princess Unicornia | October 6, 2007 06:18 AM
Very cool and nice idea... how many members you have ? Hm..we should arrange that they teach discordianism instead of Intelligent Design or so...
Posted by: Gamemaster from Switzerland (always changing masks..) | October 6, 2007 05:56 PM
GfS: How many members does Smagmoid Kids Club have? You mean you think we're keeping actual records? That's like asking how many official Discordians there are.
But I like your idea about teaching Discordianism. Our religion does have several creation myths--I mean creation true stories.
Posted by: Reverend Loveshade | October 6, 2007 06:11 PM
I'd let my kids join this in a milisec. Sign them up. Can they sign their names in Kool Aid?
Posted by: Rev. Bum Slappy | October 7, 2007 04:33 AM
The kids I'm caring for would love it. I know Reverend Loveshade but he's absolutely serious one minute and pulling your leg the next. If the club is real sign up the kids!
Posted by: TawTew the Naturally Perfumed | October 8, 2007 05:02 AM
This makes me want to have kids just so they can join! Anything Reverend Loveshade does is awesome. They don't mention es name but I know he's involved!
Posted by: Binky The WonderSkull | October 8, 2007 02:48 PM
We have The Myth of the Adulthood Fairy, The Myth of the Nipples, and Babysitter Eris. So there's a lot of creation myths!
And anybody who wants to be a member can start their own chapter. It's really not organized! If you believe its real its real! lol
Posted by: Princess Unicornia | October 9, 2007 01:17 AM
Is this supposed to be a JOKE? Well it is not FUNNY! It's SICK!
Posted by: Patriot John | October 10, 2007 07:10 PM
Sickness is in the eye of the beholder. Or in this case the stomach.
But what part do you consider sick, Patriot John? The merging of a boy's and girl's club? Teaching kids to "be prepared for anything?" That it honors a poor murdered girl? Or is it the gender-age confusion of X and Y? Or the merit badges?
Perhaps it's chosing your own uniform. Too individualistic for a group? For you?
Posted by: Adam Newton | October 14, 2007 03:51 AM
Is this a real club? I'm gonna go make some babies just so they can join!
Posted by: Banor to the Manor | February 15, 2008 05:54 PM
The club's about as real as my vampire hamster. Nothing this group does is real.
Posted by: Rev. Bootie | April 29, 2008 04:29 AM
May I congratulate you on your intelligent post.You have made my day and gained a new fan. Compared to most posts on the world wide web this is a masterpiece, I am pleased that I found your work. I shall be linking to this from all my blogs.
Posted by: HEEL CUPS | December 23, 2009 12:29 AM