Sometimes the ending is like the beginning.
First month of year: Crazy chickens. They had plenty of room to roost at night on nice perches in their own chicken house. But while most of them perched on the perches, others insisted on perching in the most uncomfortable places possible. They’d be in the midst of wires, twine, and hanging plastic bags intended to keep them out of areas where they could barely fit without cramming themselves in or even getting themselves stuck.
Last month of year: With new chickens, repeat above. Fortunately, I got advice to block them out of those areas altogether, and chicken wire did the trick so perfectly so that…wait, what’s that chicken doing? Hold on….
I discovered my particularly special plumbing talent. When it comes to indoor plumbing, I excel at calling a plumber. And I’m talented at calling someone to fix a buried-but-leaking outside pipe too. Aren’t you impressed?
Speaking of plumbing, I passed my first (and hopefully last) kidney stone during a visit to the emergency room. Fortunately, though, this year when I had a threatening encounter with a copperhead snake at the O.K. Corral–OK, barn–I wasn’t the one who had the emergency. Most snakes I find I distribute around the edges of the property to eat mice. But then I keep my pet mice protected from snakes. Go figure.
I faced a possible flooding disaster that–see the piece here.
I visited with in state friends and out of state friends. For one of them, I edited 935,000 words of material. Hint: that’s a lot. By comparison, a news service reported the exactly average length book is Brave New World at 64,531 words. Do the math.
Speaking of writing, I learned that David Gerrold, science fiction author of many things including the classic Star Trek episode “The Trouble with Tribbles,” was inspired to base a character on me. Of course I had to pay him to be inspired. (Actually, it was a donation to a worthy cause and I got free e-books too; check the link. I didn’t have to pay for this letter’s graphics, though, which I created myself).
Happy Christmas, Great Kwanzaa, Merry Chanukah, Wonderful Yule, Fine Winter/Summer Solstice, Terrific New Year!
— Alden Loveshade
What a crazy and funny year you had! Stop that chicken!
You are a humor writer, we could use you on the wikis!
See another article about The Gathering at the Grove in the link below.
My name is the link to The Grove Gathering.
The Grove Gathering was totally cool! We’ll do it next year too!
I appreciate that. But actually, I already spend more time on wikis than I probably should. I’m theoretically supposed to making a living writing. I know you do both as well, but you may have more self-control than I do when it comes to writing for free.
In other words, you did nothing all year but harass young girls?
That’s a cool charity!
Good Yule everybody and Merry Christmas and Super New Year!
Hilarious as always!
I like the blog’s new look. Is that the tank that threatened to overflow?
Yes it is. That pic was taken before it got to the high point. Actually, it’s encroaching on the high point once again. But with the runoff path I did I’m no longer worried about it.
Note to future visitors: the pic at top will change, so if you see something that doesn’t fit, you’ll know why.
Wonderful letter as always! Happy Holidays!
Happy Holidays and thanks for the laughs.
С новым годом и Рождеством.